Q for the ladies: Does your man have a friend, or several for that matter, who are not in relationships? Therefore, they need HIS time alllll the damn time? You know, constantly wanting to go out, or to watch a game, or to eat? When really, they are just lonely. They don’t have a woman, and little to no family that they communicate with. They are constantly on the move, and need someone to fill those time voids with… and that’s usually your damn man.
These friends have no consideration for his relationship. Hell, they probably wish that he wasn’t in one as well. They usually spend their time talking about women, and how there are no good ones left; or making up some excuse for why they aren’t in a relationship. Refusing to deal with the issue at the surface, which is, they are a phucking train wreck! There are normally commitment issues, or insecurities keeping these men from having and/or keeping a woman.
Now, we know how men feel about their friends, right? There is some guy code there that women will never get. So your man will never see what you do. He just looks at it as typical “guy time”, nothing more nothing less. He doesn’t see the friends intruding on your time. What used to be your QT, has now turned into MT (maybe time). Let’s not get it twisted, I’m not bashing the lonely friends, I’m really not… But I do have a two fold message to deliver:
To the men in the relationships: It is ok to have your homies… it is even ok to keep your “guys night out”… But understand where to draw the line. Women are emotional creatures, and we like our quality time. We view it as bonding time, and would like to keep the romance in the fold as well. Not to mention sex… We want… No… We NEED to have sex with our man. (FYI: It improves a woman’s attitude tremendously! If you want her to stop nagging, you know what to do…) We never… I REPEAT… NEVER need to be around our friends more than we are around our man. He just holds a certain place in our heart, and we are willing to dedicate our time and attention to him. Make your woman that same priority. It’s ok to say no, trust me they aren’t going anywhere. Your homeboys will still be lonely and begging for some time again tomorrow.
To the lonely friends: It’s ok to be alone… No really… It is!! That should be the time that you use to work on yourself. Figure out why you don’t have, or can’t keep a woman! Work on those insecurities and issues that are really blocking you from being happy. I’m sure you want the type of relationship that your friend has… and it’s possible to obtain. But you have to deal with the root of the problem first. Drinking, partying, and time fillers will not fill the void of love and a relationship. I want you to be happy just as much as you do… just not at the expense of my time.
Please let us continue nurturing our relationships without your ass in the fold! We greatly appreciate your understanding.
Signed… The women of the world